Experiencing the SWORD
For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. (Hebrews 4:12)
As the homeschooling days roll along sometimes discouragement sets in. Some days, the children are downright zoned out and other days, everything is right on target. Well yesterday I was having one of my own melt down days and suddenly, all I could see was everything wrong. So I picked up my notebook and bible and was going into some quiet time. Just then my husband beckoned me to watch a movie with him about a book that he had just finished reading to the children. I resisted for a minute. I had other things to do, but I sat down with him and we started watching the movie. It was awesome, the story of Ruby Bridges.
Needless to say, after I saw the perseverance and dexterity in that mom in the movie, I was worse off than I was before. I fussed the children into their beds because I was upset with myself and couldn't wait to be alone with my self. I was planning a party, so that I can whine and cry and beat my self up for how incapable I was. Boy oh boy, that's a lot of "I" but yes, as I swooped down on the floor in front of my room door, I don't know why there, I started crying and writing in my book. I wrote about the horrible and incapable person that I was, (comparing myself to the mom in the movie, who seemed to have it all together). I started telling Jesus how incompetent I was and I started listing all the things that were wrong with me and the way I was doing things, I highlighted all my short comings and was asking Jesus to help me.
HE allowed me to vent for a few seconds and as I was about to have the pity party of all pity parties and just completely melt down I realized something.
I recognized that two different things were happening to me at the same time. My flesh was weeping, and criticizing but as I wrote on the pages all the negative things about myself, my spirit was singing, "Thank you Lord, Thank you Lord, I just want to thank you Lord" I stopped writing as I heard the singing in my spirit and I started singing. As I picked up the pen again, I was reminded about the power that is in the name of Jesus and that it was not used only to cast out demons and bad spirits but it is also used to claim all the blessings to which we are entitled, through Jesus' finished work on the cross. I started claiming my blessings and every good thing that the Word says about me. When I was done, I realized what had happened, the Word had been made manifest in my life once again. "For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.
It happened so fast and I was truly overwhelmed. I had just experienced the separation of my soul and spirit and it was awesome. I got up off that floor and celebrated the victory - not yet seeing the manifestations of the things I confessed but already knowing that greater is HE that is in me than he that is in the world. In other words, the Holy Spirit that dwells in me is greater than the physical body that I dwell in.OH! Glory be to God. I am loving this season of my life.
So today, I have learned a life lesson that I can share with my children as we continue to seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness and watch as all other things are added unto us. The Holy Spirit is our helper and a present help in times of trouble.
I got up off that floor, strong and empowered and I opened my mouth and confessed out loud all that was written on that paper and I receive it in the mighty, powerful, capable, ever living name of JESUS the Christ.
THANK YOU LORD, Thank You Lord, I just want to thank You Lord.
As the homeschooling days roll along sometimes discouragement sets in. Some days, the children are downright zoned out and other days, everything is right on target. Well yesterday I was having one of my own melt down days and suddenly, all I could see was everything wrong. So I picked up my notebook and bible and was going into some quiet time. Just then my husband beckoned me to watch a movie with him about a book that he had just finished reading to the children. I resisted for a minute. I had other things to do, but I sat down with him and we started watching the movie. It was awesome, the story of Ruby Bridges.
Needless to say, after I saw the perseverance and dexterity in that mom in the movie, I was worse off than I was before. I fussed the children into their beds because I was upset with myself and couldn't wait to be alone with my self. I was planning a party, so that I can whine and cry and beat my self up for how incapable I was. Boy oh boy, that's a lot of "I" but yes, as I swooped down on the floor in front of my room door, I don't know why there, I started crying and writing in my book. I wrote about the horrible and incapable person that I was, (comparing myself to the mom in the movie, who seemed to have it all together). I started telling Jesus how incompetent I was and I started listing all the things that were wrong with me and the way I was doing things, I highlighted all my short comings and was asking Jesus to help me.
HE allowed me to vent for a few seconds and as I was about to have the pity party of all pity parties and just completely melt down I realized something.
I recognized that two different things were happening to me at the same time. My flesh was weeping, and criticizing but as I wrote on the pages all the negative things about myself, my spirit was singing, "Thank you Lord, Thank you Lord, I just want to thank you Lord" I stopped writing as I heard the singing in my spirit and I started singing. As I picked up the pen again, I was reminded about the power that is in the name of Jesus and that it was not used only to cast out demons and bad spirits but it is also used to claim all the blessings to which we are entitled, through Jesus' finished work on the cross. I started claiming my blessings and every good thing that the Word says about me. When I was done, I realized what had happened, the Word had been made manifest in my life once again. "For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.
It happened so fast and I was truly overwhelmed. I had just experienced the separation of my soul and spirit and it was awesome. I got up off that floor and celebrated the victory - not yet seeing the manifestations of the things I confessed but already knowing that greater is HE that is in me than he that is in the world. In other words, the Holy Spirit that dwells in me is greater than the physical body that I dwell in.OH! Glory be to God. I am loving this season of my life.
So today, I have learned a life lesson that I can share with my children as we continue to seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness and watch as all other things are added unto us. The Holy Spirit is our helper and a present help in times of trouble.
I got up off that floor, strong and empowered and I opened my mouth and confessed out loud all that was written on that paper and I receive it in the mighty, powerful, capable, ever living name of JESUS the Christ.
THANK YOU LORD, Thank You Lord, I just want to thank You Lord.
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